I am not a professional. This is just what works for me. Maybe all couples should have "wish lists" of words that they each want to hear from their spouse.
1. I love you.
5. I am sorry that you're hurting. What you're going through sounds really hard.
6. You are beautiful.
7. I am glad that I married you.
8. I would love to spend a romantic evening with you some time soon.
9. I figured out why I've been frustrated lately, and I'm ready to explain it to you.
11. That isn't what I originally had in mind, but it sounds like a reasonable request.
12. That doesn't sound reasonable to me, but that's just my initial reaction to what you said. Can you tell me more about what you're thinking?
13. I know that we want different things, but let's find a compromise that we both can live with.
14. I want to make sure I really understand what you are saying.
Let me know if I have it right. What I thought you said was . . .
15. How have you been feeling lately about . . . .